Friday, January 27, 2012

swimming primitive

I sailed your severed skin savour

while smiling.
cupped hands

catching telescopes on time
like juggling Alvarez

throwing stones
at the temple gongs-

to quench what swells

while breathing. I could surprise your
mouth with mine.

follow touch

with touch
but in the door way

flounder-swimming half faced

into the sand
swimming primitive

the way i learned to do.

you couldn't make me flip
but that doesn't mean i can't.


  1. hey there. i've been reading what you are posting. Most of them were great. i love what you are writing. I've been blogging for a while and only have a few posts. I made a new blog last year and i would love if you could give me any criticism. i just want to improve my writing. still new to this kind of literature and i find it good in expressing one's thoughts and emotions. I admire you're work and would love to hear some comments from inspiring writers such as yourself.

    here is the link to my blog,

    best of luck,


  2. hey ding. I like the passion on your blog, you seem to write from your heart. one trick I like to use, while writing, is the metaphor. i.e. instead of saying, "I'm feeling bored without you," you could say, "and the dust grows easy, on the winter coats hanging comfortless..."
    keep it up bro.

  3. oh okay. i'll keep that in mind. Thanks for the advice, i appreciate it. :)